Staying Home

I never wanted to be a stay at home mom. As a matter of fact, I never really thought about being a Mom other than the fact that I knew I wanted more than one kid. I actually have a desire to have four kids - 2 boys and 2 girls. I have my boys now I need my girls. On a side note, why are boys names so much harder to pick than girls names? We have two girls names ready to go and we have had to scramble and reject lots of names to come up with boys names we both like. Anyway, back to the topic at hand, staying home. All through college I thought I would be a teacher, then I got to be a teacher and that didn't work out so I started over with nursing. It took me a while to get ready for nursing school and then get accepted and go to nursing school. I graduated and had high hopes for working hard and making lots of money. Obviously that one didn't work out like I had planned. A "no thank you" denial letter from the state board of nursing has forced me to stay home with my child for a while. We are in the process of appealing the state board's decision, but if they don't reverse what they have said, I will never be a nurse and will be looking for yet a third career path.

I have mixed feelings about staying at home. My mom tried it very unsuccessfully and I just assumed that I would hate it also. I don't hate it but some days it isn't my favorite. I love my two year old headache with all my heart, but I have learned that sometimes you have to give the child away and just sit in your home and do nothing to gain some sanity back. I have also learned that just because there are 24 hours in a day and all of mine are spent at home does not make me a good housekeeper, nor does it make my home cleaner or more organized. One more thing I have learned is that a 2 year old does not self-entertain for 10-12 hours at a time. The child must be stimulated. However, on the positive side, I have learned to better clean up after myself and I LOVE spending time with Will and watching him learn and grow daily. We go to the park or the mall to play almost every day because he needs the social interaction and I need a break. I only wish I had more energy. In 6 weeks and 1 day I will have another child to add to our family and I am excited about that, but being 7.5 months pregnant makes me tired all the time and it is difficult to keep up with Will and the house chores.

All in all I am surprised at how much I enjoy staying home, and even if I am able to get my nursing license, I will probably stay home much more than I had intended. I think I would like to work 1-2 shifts a week rather than 3 so that I can spend time with my kids and not miss anything. I love our family and am blessed to have the opportunity to stay home and learn how wonderful it is.